Someone must be writing all this down (part one)

My whole life I have had this belief that someone keeps track of everything that happens to us and everything we do. Not a god, more like a karmic ledger keeper. Not to be confused with a TrapperKeeper (For those South Park fans). Back to my point. I thought that there existed someone or thing that logged all the glasses of juice I drank, all the books I read, all the friends I had, all the times I did well in class....you get the point. I pictured this ledger as having a checks and balance appearance to it. One side all the good stuff and the other all the bad. I remember thinking one day many years ago that we, my family, had been incredibly fortunate that no one had been mugged, the house hadn't burned down, we hadn't suffered any great loss. It was a shortime later that my older sister died. She had been suffering from Anorexia for about 14 years at the point. She had finally seemed like she had turned a corner, moving towards a more healthy self-image. On June 29th she got married and the next day she went into cardiac arythmia on the way to her honeymoon and they were not able to save her. I saw this as a sign, like a balance had been struck. After all these years of fairly ordinary life there had to be some sort of reality check. That is life. I also thought that we would be passed over for a long time to come. And I guess that was not the way it worked. My mother died 2 and half years later. So now I think "we really deserve to left alone now".
And as the years have passed since this time I still believe this ledger exist. It is karma.
This last week somewhat proves to me my theory is just (and that is all that really matters to me).
I also beliieve that they keep track of all the money you spent on things that you never used, my entry must be embarassing.

I took a sleep pose test with really odd questions...........

And the wierd thing is that this is the sleep pose they came up with for me:

Find your own pose!

And oddly they are correct. This is exactly how I sleep.

I have had the strangest 24 hours. I dreamt of Opelu and Opihi. Was correct when I predicted that my transmission was shot (not one's favorite prediction).

And the rule of threes proved itself.

For future reference..........

Wack = Bad
Dope = Good

And I am a dork.

Clouds, CLOUDS, CLOUDS!!!! It's Armagedeon!!!

I love to watch this....... After being a bike messenger for years on the streets of Boston and hating cold, wet, rainy days I welcome light winds and CLOUDSSSS!!!!!

There's a rat in the fridge....what ima gonna do

Because of where we live (in an Ohana unit, which for those of you not in Hawaii, is an in-law unit). We have no space in the house for our fridge and so this is located on the lanai (porch). It has faired well for the past few years considering that it is exposed to the elements. But finally it may have met it's match, after typhoons, rainstorms, sunlight(which can do major damage here) it started eminating a foul odor. I made Mr Man do some hunting to see where the smell was coming from. After just a few minutes he found the source; a rat had chewed it's way into the back of the fridge and made the fatal mistake of sticking it's head into the fan, presumably the fan was off when this happened, the fan kicked on and there went the rat. And so Mr Man removed the dead rat and threw him into the horse pasture (they don't care). But thanks to the diligence of poppy the cat the rat was carried into the living room for us to praise. GACK. Again I had Mr Man bring it out and we haven't seen the rat bastard since. But now the problem is that we think the rat bastard broke the motor that runs the fridge and we are stuck between getting it fixed ($$$ because of where we live) or buy a new one ($$$...well....because it is new). So for now we have to freeze huge bottles of water in the freezer (this oddly works fine) and transfer them to the fridge. I know this sounds so exciting to all of you, but really it's not.
I will leave you with something to ponder.....this is for those of you that watch TV. There is a Snickers commercial where this Grecian formula looking dude gets shot down at the end of his date and when he returns to the car to sulk about it sees that there is a Snickers in his glove box, when he opens it there is a tiny little woman who tells him not to fret and proceeds to stroke his ego until he bites her head off. Um...........yeah.
And I leave you with a pretty picture from the Big Island.

Scolapendra...or something like it....giant centipede!!!

I awoke at 3am last night to a searing pain on my leg that was like someone had just set fire to the inside of my leg.......IT HURT. I tried to go back to sleep, but it was impossible. And then I had to be up at 6am and down at the beach by 7am for a full day of diving. All day all I could think of was this.................


It bit me and was painful......little f*cker.

In other news, tomorrow is the birthday of a very good friend of mine, she has birthed the children of half the people I know. She has a great heart. Her husband has arranged for all of us to be on this local beach when they come in on their two man Wa'a (hawaiian outrigger canoe). And then we celebrate, David has made Ceviche, I bought a lilikoi cheesecake, and my friend Dom will bring something good, it should be really nice. And she deserves it. Maybe I will post some pictures, a party with them is always photo worthy.

Touchy subject.........

We were sitting on the couch when I whiffed something that I have whiffed only once before coming from that dog. I think the dog queefed... Yep, I am pretty sure that is what was happening. Mr Man on the other hand had a more poetic way of describing this........"Dog, I think that is the universe telling us that you need a douche". I snorted avocado thru my nose, painful. I wonder if that is truly the case and am I supposed to do anything about it? Does there exist a line of Massengill for dogs? (and cats?) I refuse to be one of those dog owners that spends an inordinate amount of time and money making sure that the dog has only the best. I do feed her good food, but I will not buy her $25/pound BARF (Biologically Active Raw Food). The only Spa like moment she has ever had was when I had to bring her to the groomer so that she could get a deep cleaning and hair cut. The cleaning needed to be done professionally because she had rolled in so much horse poo that she had a green tinge to her and no amount of bathing was taking that tinge (or smell) away. The groomer shaved her right done to the quick, She looked like a 40lb chihuahua, I could not look at her without laughing. The dog would not let the groomer get near her face, so she looked like a 40lb chihuahua with my dogs face glued on. And again I laugh and laugh, you had to be there.
But I digress. In this day and age your dog can get a massage, therapy, and be a guest at a Bed & Breakfast, why not douches? Why not a spa for your dog, after her/his very stressful day of running amok most dogs benefit from a seaweed wrap. Help your urban canine detox from the stressful work week with a mud bath. Haven't dogs beat us to the punch already? My dog jumps into the horses trough, rolls in poo, and sits in the tide pools at the beach. I don't know what to do about this little "queefing" issue, but hell she is a dog and they do smell.
Time for more coffee.
Ciao for now.

Two days later.....

I just saw a commercial advertising cable TV that used the motto "stay out of trouble, stay inside". We are in deep trouble now. The cable companies, who are obviously run by McDonalds, don't want you to get too involved in life beyond your remote.
BRB, I need breakfast (it is early here).
I ate and tehn went of and did many errands. Took the dog, she loves doing errands, make her feel important. And now lame as I feel about it I am going to finish up and cop out by pasting a picture of the Dog..........

Been so long........been busy (kinda)

I have been thinking lately that because I have been reading other peoples blogs for so long I have so stupid expectation of what this page is supposed to be. I cannot duplicate anothers experience as my own and I cannot expect that oof mine either. Does that make any sense? Well, it does to me and that since that is why I am really here, so there. (please stop kicking the dog)
When I first found online journals I think I stumbled across www.shelleyness.com, I can't link to her because she had a child and no longer writes for the masses. I really miss her writing and hostile sense of humor, it was reaffirmingly refreshing. (she doesn't know that she smells like horses)
I love the writing of many people and I tend to hold myself to some standard that is not me, and then I use that as an excuse to keep me from writing. Fuck, I can write. I write in my head all day everyday, I narrate to myself everything that happens to me during any given day. (Dog, please don't look so dejected)

I am currently being lectured about peanut butter oil and the evil it creates when I allows it to drip down the side of the jar, obviously I am evil.

.................Back to today's entry.
So it has been sometime since I have written, I have been dealing with the death of a friendship, yes I finally allowed the "end" in friendship to rear it's face. And getting over it and past it is still causing me some angst. It hurts and I remind myself to not lot back, LOOK FORWARD. I find myself screaming this in my head in the middle of the night. I lie there assuming that whatever he is up to, it is probably better than what I have been up to. It is extremely self-defeating and RIDICULOUS.

More about this latter.

night. me.